Pop 'n' Rock Stew Feb - Oct '04

Oh Sharleen Spiteri...
Do you eat dairy?
Your complexion is four out of four.

Your smooth creamy skin
Is packing 'em in,
But your middle aged pop is a bore.

When I was in my early teens
Paul Rodgers wore the tightest jeans.
The century turns, he's still alive,
And belting out his hernia jive.
Feel like making love, alright
Now and keep it up all night.
Well groomed, craggy, with less hair,
Most famous fan is Tony Blair.
The PM swallows sexual myths!
Maybe Gordon likes The Smiths?

Here comes Peter Andre's ego,
Pumping life in that flat chest.
Making sure wherever we go
We can't ignore this plastic pest.

His noxious song should rot alone
Like a corpse does in the dark.
It's time for us to have a moan
About Pop Idol's Sam and Mark.

As we look on with eyes of wonder
At Justin Hawkins' Darkness' plunder.
Latest step on his rock career -
Best British album of the year?
A song about STD's
Brings an audience to it's knees.
His grating shrieks slice through the air -
His catsuit slips, there's pubic hair!
At the Brits he's raised aloft.
He's just some bloke from Lowestoft.

Gary Jules the one hit wonder
Stole Justin Hawkins' Darkness' thunder
By being Christmas Number One
Depressed the UK's festive fun.

Gary Jules with hat, no pipe,
Inflections quite like Michael Stipe,
Is responsible for Tears for Fears
Returning to assault my ears.